Leave It To Beaver

How many of us watch or watched Leave It To Beaver??  The all too idealistic June Cleaver forever impresses upon women how we think we should contribute to the family dynamic.

This morning as I was trying to explain to Spencer what I pictured when I think about the wife and mother I ought and want to be, June Cleaver was basically what I came up with.

I told him how I want, so badly, to be the kind of wife and mother that just has it together. One who has cooked meals, clean house, and is there for her family, with a positive attitude and a smile on her face.  I compare myself way to much... But I do the all too common "compare my weaknesses to others' strengths" thing...  And then Spencer brought to light a new perspective that has me determined to start anew, he pointed out that focusing on my flaws is selfish.  He first asked me why I never dwell on my strengths, and I responded that it was vain and self-centered.  Then he explained that so was dwelling on my flaws.  It is, quite simply, "self-ish."

How's that for a fast one, huh?!  I know that focusing on one's "self," is just a recipe for trouble.  We may start off trying to build self-confidence and self-esteem and all those other "self-isms. " But that is all it is, "self-ish."  The most important thing I can do is not compound my flaws and every aspect of my nature into one thing.  I learned recently in a small lesson given by a dear friend, I am not subject to only ONE thing, ONE role, if you will.  I may only think of myself as a wife and a mother, but I am also a daughter, a sister, a coach, a granddaughter, a niece, a friend, a cook, a housekeeper, a neighbor, and the list goes on...  When I fail at any one of those things it doesn't mean I am a failure as a person, it simply means that I failed at that one thing.  And if I failed at one or even two things, all hope is not lost, I will simply dust myself off and try again.

And look at this face :)  He doesn't think I fail at anything.